I followed Derek Webb‘s little scavenger hunt all the way to Nashville last night with my buddy Christopher Plemmons, and I was severely disappointed. Sure his new songs were great, but I already knew that. I wanted him to do something! Like… play some music?? He didn’t even stick around for me to meet him. It rather seemed like a waste of 12 hours of driving, but maybe it wasn’t. Nashville was still a pretty cool place to visit, and I pulled my first all-nighter to boot. Amazing.
I’m trying to write an upbeat love song. It’s not going so well! I think the idea I had for it was good, but I always seem to end up with a cynical undercurrent. That’s not the worst thing ever, but it kind of ruins the mood if you pick up on it. So I’m trying to make the lyrics just cheesy enough that some people will understand what I’m really saying, but most people will still be able to enjoy it as a lighthearted love song. The EP I release this fall will probably include it, so you can judge how well I did when you hear it. It’s called Mary Kate.
So far this summer, which has been about a month and a half, Weezer has been my main musical input. The first time I heard them was on the Buddy Holly music video included with Windows 95. Obviously I was confused – what a great idea for a music video though! Spike Jonze is cool, yo. I think what really sets Weezer apart from similar bands is the clean, almost timid vocals (and the lyrics that correspond with them) set against the gritty guitars. Pinkerton was especially revealing, almost awkwardly so. Rivers’ attitude towards being a rockstar is often disarming – what is there to dislike? That’s why I was a little disappointed with the Red Album – they lyrics had mostly lost their distinctive honesty and self-deprecation, and seemed more pop-ish. I’ve really been inspired by Weezer though, and I’ve been trying to integrate more honesty into my own lyrics, with mixed results. It’s hard to tell people what’s really in your heart! I sometimes hope they’ll think I’m joking… 
And this is why it’s thrilling: I get to write about all the stuff I think about all the time! That is good news indeed. The other thrill-type aspect is that this site has had the fastest development time of any I have worked on up to this point. Of course, I didn’t have a picky client to deal with, just cool, calm, collected me. More importantly though, I’m using WordPress. I’ve just become a huge fan! After trying many free cms’s (Joomla is GROSS, Textpattern is overly complicated, ExpressionEngine has a lame core version…), WordPress was the clear winner. I plan on using it for many of my illustrious clients. I made my own theme for this site, which I fondly named Grayson. I’ll be expanding on it as the occasion arises.
So that’s it! I’m going to be a blogger. Every cool person needs to blog.
Some things aren’t fun to talk about. But sometimes the darkest secrets are the ones that bring the most joy when they are uncovered and undone. Today I heard a man testify to his release from a six year pornography addiction. I wanted to scream when I heard him say it! So God’s power really is incredible. It’s good to be reminded of that again. There’s a lot going on, and I usually do pretty well about getting past temptations – at least in my view. But God… He takes freedom to an entirely different level! I think I’m almost ready to experience it.
Fall away
Lead the way
Only just begun to see
Lonely now from
What she cowered
Before, she wouldn’t be
Freedom lives
Freedom lives
Time’s to go
This she knows
Far away from near
Truth be told
Time is sold
Her wine is wasted here
Freedom lives
Rapture gives
And lovingly restrains
Time will wait
Set the rate
It’s not conserving pains
Sometime within the next lifetime, things will change. I know it. Someday, an epiphany will strike you, and you will no longer be a follower – even as I rather am in this writing.
So many things are given to you to depend on. Advertised as support to your health, or exceptionally decisive peers as support to your life choices; if you know how to rely on something else you’re pretty much all set. Nobody will ever require anything more.
But that non-essential is not a limit.
In plain sight, others have gone beyond the borders of mere consciousness, and the rewards were sweet. Even still, if you have the courage to overcome, you can become the one to admire. It’s hard to see someone else you know take the journey and leave you behind, but it’s also an inspiration.
Sometime it will be you.
A pseudo-limerick that I wrote today while I was reading my psychology book.
Multitasking baby.
—————–
Go on, young sailor, and fend off the blow
Remember your life, and grow
Your freedom is gained
Through the love you’ve profaned
Would wisdom enrich what you know?
Concentric commitment – relive and repent
(Except from the time that was spent)
And nobody cared
If the truth made you scared
It’s painful to straighten what’s bent
For now you can linger with all that you blamed
Forget if it makes you ashamed
In time, what you know
Will change as you grow
Your future’s in what you were named
Just a heads-up here folks: most of what you see on this blog will probably not make much sense. I think I’m a little bad in the head. Anyway, I hope all you fans enjoy reading my sincere, yet completely irrational thoughts!
Stephen